november, in photos.

this november held a lot of significant moments that i mostly didn't think twice about as they were happening. it was only when i pulled images for this post that i realized how many of them had stories hidden in them.

and so, here is november, in photos and words.

the cubs won the world series.

which is not news to you, i am sure. but i (like you, probably) know some people from chicago. which is to say, i know how some people from chicago LOVE CHICAGO. so i got pretty into it, as much as a person could get into it without having to actually watch any of the games. like, i could give you an approximate play-by-play of game seven, including the part where i prayed over those cubs players, on the field and at bat, without even knowing their names, all without having watched a minute of it. i guess you could say i was secondhand invested. i was genuinely excited when they won. it was a win for my people, and that felt like a win for me.

and, i think my favorite part about the whole thing was that none of it had to do with the yankees or the red sox. which is how i realized i have some level of ptsd from growing up in the state between new york and boston.

i flew to boston for 28 hours, just to see needtobreathe with H.

which you already know because i already wrote about it. but for a recap about a month that holds some weight, it can't be left out.

i read the art of memoir.

which is pretty insignificant in itself, except for this moment when my boss saw me reading it and asked why. "because," he said, "that seems like a book you'd read for a reason."

and the thing i didn't say, that i should've said, that i couldn't quite say out loud at the time was this: because i want to write one.

and so i'm saying it now. because it is a thing that needs to be said.

i was chosen as one of three winners in a handwriting contest.

which is insane, because the entry on the left –– the one that is literally just my handwriting, in sharpie –– is the one that won. (including my second entry here, the one in the shape of a heart, because i had the most fun making that one.)

also, this contest was for andrew belle, and do you even know how much i love him? (yes. probably. i've written about it a few times.)

i noticed he reposted my entry as one of his favorites, as he did with many others, while sitting in the boston airport. it felt unreal that he'd seen it, and liked it enough to repost it. and then, almost a week later, while i was waiting to meet molls at crema, my jaw dropped when i saw he picked mine.

the following week, i dropped off the original handwritten paper to his management company so they could properly scan it, and i was told it was one of his top favorites from the beginning, that he kept coming back to it, that he said he needed to pick more than one winner, as was originally planned, because he liked others but "couldn't let go" of mine.

the thing is, hand writing lyrics in sharpie felt like a nothing thing. it felt like a weird, kind of pointless thing i had started doing, and kept doing, without really knowing why. and i don't think this contest is the reason, but i think it's evidence that making things you feel compelled to make isn't pointless.

people keep asking me what i won, but i mostly keep thinking about how a person whose art i love looked at something i made and liked it. and that, in itself, feels like winning.

we elected a new president.

which is not a subject i am willing to write about, but i would be lying if i tried to claim i was untouched by this election and its outcome.

but honestly, the thing i keep coming back to is this: the cross has the final word. (in more or less words, but this has a nice sound to it, doesn't it?) i will remain unshaken by the results and the media and your comments, and i refuse to feel hopeless or disappointed or afraid, because i know who holds my future (and the whole world) and it is not the president of the united states. (nor is it any of the supreme court justices.)

(related: have you listened to more perfect, the radiolab spin-off podcast about the supreme court? i have, and i can now name all eight justices off the top of my head. ASK ME ABOUT IT.)

i spent (and still spend) my days with this little guy.

which is nothing new, but the way i don't hate mondays feels like a new revelation every week. i could not be any more thankful for this job, and for this family.

i saw LANY play.

along with 95% of nashville, as seen here (and that photo is zoomed). i love them, but attending this show made me feel the most 27 (and too-old-for-this) that i've ever felt.

i drove three hours for a cheeseburger.

which i also wrote about, but first whataburger. noteworthy.

(but how many hours does it take to get to the closest in-n-out?)

i saw the fray play for the first time in ...too long.

and it is a surprise to no one that i cannot pick just one photo to share here.

the fray is a band that will forever be significant to me, while the most common response i get from other people when i mention their music is, "are they still around?"

and you know what? that was basically my analysis of the show. it was for the fans. the ones who know they are still around. which is to say, i loved it. for reasons probably nobody else would understand.

i got a second job.

which is a thing that kind of just happened, in such a casual way that i basically forgot to tell anyone about it.

on mondays and wednesdays, after i leave nanny job #1, i go to nanny job #2. and it is kind of perfect because i go right from one to the next, so it really just feels like an extra two hours tacked onto the end of my day, except with a baby boy who is two months younger. and do you know, there is a pretty significant difference between 6 months and 8 months? one of them is speed-crawls and thinks he can stand/walk on his own (lol), while the other one sits happily and still tips over occasionally if he's not paying attention.

i spent a whole week in charlotte for thanksgiving.

which i will probably get around to posting sometime before christmas, but in the mean time. here i am with the seven pies my mom and i marathon-baked the day before thanksgiving.