let Him love you.

Years ago, I felt like God kept saying to me, “just you and Me.” Which is really sweet, except that it felt like He was asking me for something He already had, and I didn’t understand why He kept saying it or what He wanted from me.

Months later, I re-read this book called “Redeeming Love.” I think I reached for it partly because it was right before the movie came out, and all the publicity about it made me want to read it again. But I think it was mostly because the first time I read it, I experienced a closeness with God that I hadn’t experienced while reading any book other than the Bible.

If you’re unfamiliar, it’s basically a story about a guy who marries a prostitute and showers her with unconditional love because God told him to — and he was all in on whatever God wanted. For a girl who was sold into prostitution as a child, she has a hard time understanding what this guy is trying to do — or get from her — by the way he’s acting. And so, the story unfolds.

At one point, not long after he marries her and brings her to his home, she is angry and pushes back on his agenda. She asks him what he had in mind when he brought her home. What exactly was he thinking would happen?

He responds by saying he wants her to love him. (Of course he does.) But then he says this: “I want you to trust me enough to let me love you, and I want you to stay here with me so we can build a life together.”

I want you to trust me enough to let me love you.

When I read that, it felt like God was saying, “Me too.”

And I realized that in all my years, growing up in church, the focus had always been on how I could love God. He wants that — of course He does. But also He loves me, and He wants me to trust Him enough to let Him.

It’s easy for me to know and to say that God loves me. But it’s a whole other thing to let Him do that.

I think about the people I love — who love me back — but who sometimes resist my love. When I want to give to them by paying for their meal or speaking kind words or offering a helping hand. They try to (and sometimes do) reject it. They say no, or “You don’t have to do that,” or “I’ll get you back next time.”

I often think, I wish you would just let me.

A long time ago, when I didn’t have much, when I couldn’t say no and when I couldn’t offer anything in return, I learned the art of receiving — from another person, at least. I had no other option than to simply say, “Thank you,” and receive their help — and their love.

But I realized I wasn’t doing that with God. I wanted His love. I wanted to be with Him. I wanted to build a life with Him. But what I kept doing was asking Him how to build a life with Him, and then kind of bracing myself. Because honestly, faith is wild.

I wanted God. I loved Him. But I also didn’t really trust Him enough to fully let go. To fall into His love. To let it hold me and protect me in everything.

It turns out, God telling me He wanted “just you and Me” wasn’t about whether He had me or not, or whether I loved Him or He loved me. It was more about how we do this together. How I will continue to feel the way I did — until I trusted Him enough to let Him love me.

The people who love me often do it well, and I’m so grateful, but it pales in comparison to the perfect love God has for me. He loves me better than anyone else ever could — but I have to let Him. I have to trust Him. I have to choose to do that.

The offer is there, but it’s my choice — and yours — to not just say yes but to let Him in.

Sometimes what’s yours to do on a Thursday is to stop trying to figure out how to love God or love people better and just be loved by God. Let Him hold you. Let Him protect you. Let Him sing over you. Let Him do it without thinking about how you can do anything in return.

Let Him love you, even on a Thursday.