someday, sarah.

i skipped my journalism class tonight because i feel like crap. still. seriously, what is with this cold? i rarely get sick. and when i do, it usually only goes like this: i get a cold (okay, yes, the most i ever get is a cold, so when i say “i’m sick” i really just mean “i have a minor cold”) and i have to blow my nose a few times and refrain from sharing other people’s drinks, but other than that, i’m fully functional. after about a week or so of poor sleep and sniffling, i lose my voice and everyone all of a sudden thinks i must feel terrible because i sound terrible, when really, i finally feel 100% - minus the fact that nothing comes out when i try to speak. but that only lasts a day or so and the whole thing is over.

seriously. with the exception of whatever it was that i had back in october (which my mom will tell you was the swine flu), that’s usually how it goes when i get sick. this time, however, it’s really trying to bring me down. it’s rather annoying, especially since i’m back in school and i don’t have time to do things like lay around all day, breathing through my nose, waiting for it to stop running, all while worrying about how i might possibly be going deaf because my ears are plugged up.

i realized this morning, when i finally got out of bed and dragged myself to school, that this wasn’t my typical “i’m sick” situation and i wasn’t going to make it all day. so i did what i could to make arrangements to leave early, skipping my journalism class. however, my professor - who teaches at least two monday classes - only has office hours on tuesdays and thursdays. i don’t know how that makes any sense, but i called to see if she happened to be there.

she wasn’t. so i left a message, and she never called me back.

so i drove home. and the whole time, all i kept thinking was, i should just suck it up and go to class. i’m going to be missing a lot because this class is only once a week. but i really don’t feel well. there’s no way i can sit through that class and actually be focused enough to pay attention. but i’m gonna miss so much. i should just go…” and so on.

once i got home, i e-mailed my professor and prayed that she’d be nice about it even though i didn’t e-mail her before class. you know how teachers get. “DON’T miss class. but if you ABSOLUTELY have to, make sure you e-mail me beforehand so we can work something out.” i spent a few minutes freaking out about that, but then i fell asleep.

i woke up when my mom got home and my first thought was, ugh. i should’ve just gone to class. it wouldn’t have been that bad. even though it would’ve been worse. but then i realized it was 7 o’clock and my teacher had e-mailed me back and she was nice about it! phew.

i hate missing class.

i hate being sick even more. even when it is just a cold.

yesterday was the longest, most miserable day of my life.

not really. but at the time, it sure felt like it. i had a day full of classes (9:30 a.m. to 9:15 p.m.) and i wasn’t feeling too well. SO fun, right? i mean, everyone knows that when you don’t feel like yourself, a college classrom full of strangers is exactly the place you want to be. and, as if that’s not enough, wednesdays are my double chem days. lecture and lab. what a bonus.

i’m feeling much better today though. and by ‘much better,’ i mean i feel about the same - like i could fall asleep every time i blink and ate practically nothing all morning, but i don’t have class today and that definitely qualifies as ‘much better.’

however, i do have tons of homework that needs to get done. and i’m so stressed out about all of it, i don’t even know what to do with myself. well actually, apparently i do. i’m ignoring it, and posting a blog instead. i can be so productive sometimes, you know?

but seriously, i need to get cracking on this research, otherwise i’ll be getting no sleep tonight. as opposed to the few hours i usually get.

remember when i was excited to go back to school? yeah. what was i thinking?

that’s basically like me saying, “i can’t wait for next wednesday!”